August 8th is a big day for me. It’s my last
official day at my part time job, I’m moving out of St Pauls, I wrote the last
final exam I’ll ever have to write in my undergrad degree, and there’s exactly
one month until I leave for Vietnam! I really don’t know what I’m feeling… or
how I should feel. A part of me is sad to say goodbye to a lot of my fellow INDEVOURS,
and to the great people I work with. Another part of me is freaking out,
wondering what I’m about to get myself into. The other part is so excited to
embark on my journey of a lifetime, and to start “doing development work”.
But
for me, this landmark day of August 8th isn’t really about all those
feelings. It’s about reflecting on everything I’ve learned in these past 3
years of school… and hoping it’s enough to prepare me for the real world. I can
explain to you what why the poor are most susceptible to climate change, I can define
neoliberalism, I could even tell you how eutrophication impacts a river system,
but in the end will any of that matter when I’m in the field? What’s even more
scary to me is the thought that pretty soon, I’ll be making decisions and
writing reports that (hopefully) will impact the livelihoods of real people. I
won’t just be learning about these development problems, I’m going to be a part
of them. I can only hope that everything I’ve learned will help me make the
right decision, and the decision that will have the most impact. I suppose that
if my studies have taught me anything though, it’s that development problems
are too complicated to have an answer to. I’m just going to have to go into my
placement organization with the most open mind possible… ready to learn and
prepared to fail.
Congratulations on being done! Soak in this last month at home, and I hope you'll have sufficient time to prepare yourself (probably more mentally than anything, at least that's what it is for me!) before you head off. Sounds like you're going into it with the right frame of mind.
ReplyDeleteThis is a great post Michelle! Definitely a big day, and you summed up a lot of the feelings that I think we are all experiencing.
ReplyDeleteI have wondered some of the same things, whether anything I have learned to this point is tangible in order to help someone else in the field. However, I have come to realize that some of the most important things I have learned are about myself and practical life skills, which in the end are more valuable than anything you can learn from a book or a lecture. You have taken on the right attitude and I'm sure it will take you far on your placement!