It’s been 2 weeks since I’ve returned to Canada (I apologize
for the hiatus in writing blog posts due to the chaos of leaving Hanoi then
coming back home, by the way) and it’s been the biggest two weeks of ups and
downs in my life. From tears to joy in the airport, to embarrassing silent tears
of missing my Vietnamese friends on a GO bus ride. From starting an incredible
new job, to feeling like I can’t connect with my friends and family the same
way anymore. From celebrating completing my undergrad, to the realization that
my classmates (and best friends) and I are now all heading down very different
paths.
I also haven’t been able to shake the feeling of my own home
feeling familiar, but very different at the same time. The places, the
lifestyle, the people, are all “normal” to me. But at the same time, there are
new buildings, places I used to frequent have changed (what do you mean Tim Hortons
has changed their cups?!), and my friends/families lives have moved on while I
was gone. Even the look of our Canadian money has changed during my 8 months
away. And of course, I’ve changed in ways I’m still realizing. In terms of
habits that have changed, “Oi” is still part of my daily vocabulary, I still give/receive
things with 2 hands, and I’ll use chopsticks over a fork/knife. I forgot how to
call over a waiter during my first few days back, and I nearly got run over by
traffic my first few times crossing a street because “oh yeah, you don’t just
step into traffic when you want to get to the other side of the road in Canada”.
Little moments bring on waves of wanting to get on the next flight to Hanoi:
like someone using a plastic water bottle when I just lived in a place where
tap water was not drinkable, or the thought that for the price of a “nice” meal
in Canada I could feed myself for weeks in Vietnam, or reading a blog post from
a dear Vietnamese friend. And there was one point last week where I said "if one more person asks me how my trip was I am going to scream".
On a positive level however, I’ve certainly become more aware of the
parts of my culture and Vietnamese culture that I value. I feel I’m more open,
more mature, more culturally sensitive, more aware of how vast the world is and
so ready to explore more of it. I’m a better communicator, more adaptive, more
resilient, more comfortable being out of my comfort zone. These are all things
I got the chance to identify during our debriefing sessions. But I also have
been frustrated by feeling different in ways I cannot identify. Certain social
situations have made me feel like I know I am different, but I just can’t say
what that difference is. Such is the pains of reverse culture shock I suppose.
Despite these “growing pains”, this week I started an
amazing job at the Markham Fair as a summer student. I have several responsibilities,
including organizing/running a community garden, running sessions in primary
schools teaching kids about planting, planting the sunflowers and pumpkins that
the kids put into pots at these sessions, maintaining the gardens around the
fairgrounds, creating a corn maze, and assisting with environmentally-focused
summer camps. In my first 2 days, I have researched about community gardens,
meet with a man involved in a town of Markham community garden, researched corn
mazes, and got in touch with schools about my sessions! The job is very much
about me accomplishing the goals of the position in my own way, and I love that
I can take ownership of the projects I am involved in. I hope to keep my blog
going this summer talking about what I’m up to at my job!
Until next time internet…
